Nova’s Birth Story

Birth Choices and Covid: When we were pregnant with our second, much of the questions of how and where we would welcome our baby to the world were already resolved. We knew who our midwife would be, that we would be having our baby at home, and that we wanted the group of people with us immediately after the birth to be very limited.

What we had no way of planning for was the pandemic. In March 2020 we went into lock down in California. I finished out my last few weeks of work and the feeling of isolation started to set in more and more.

We had been told our “guess date” was in the end of June, one day after my husbands birthday. The entire pregnancy we sort of expected our baby to either arrive before or on my husbands birthday.

As June and the birthdays inched closer and closer, the fear of Covid was occupying my mind. We all heard those horror stories of moms birthing without their support person, being separated from their babies, and not having access to the needed medical staff and equipment.

The last month of my pregnancy, we went deep into isolation. We knew that if any of us were to have Covid we would no longer be able to have a home birth with our midwife. While my first solution was to simply avoid getting Covid, my second alternative, that Ze’en wanted to hear nothing about, was having a free birth. Luckily, our isolation attempts worked seamlessly and none of us got covid before the birth.

With Covid we also made the decision that Cleo would be at the birth of her sibling. We’ll have a separate post all about having her at the birth but I can tell you it was one of the best decisions we have made.

The week of my due date, and my husbands birthday, we all started getting anxious as to when baby would join us. Each night, I started to have prodromal labor. I started to imagine simply having the baby on my own in my shower in the middle of the night, rather than ever waking my husband or midwife.

Prodromal labor was exhausting. I would be up from at least midnight to 5 every night working through contractions. Then, I would spend all day taking care of our toddler. My due date came and went and the prodromal labor continued. On Friday after my EDD, we had our “40 week” appointment with my midwife. She let me know that she suspected labor would be much faster with this one given it was my second but also because of the prodromal labor. She urged me to call her sooner rather than later and that she would not mind coming to see us and having to leave if it wasn’t time. As she left, she said, “I suspect I’ll be seeing you sooner than you think”.

Sure enough, that night, I was bouncing on my birth ball, when all the sudden there was a pop! Nope, not my water breaking but rather the birth ball popping. It was the ball we had gotten for Cleos birth and it had spent much of its time in our garage. When we had inflated it and I started using it for the prodromal labor it was obviously misshaped but we didn’t think too much about it. As I was laughing on the floor, I started my nightly contractions. We placed a quick curbside pickup order at REI for a new birth ball as I knew I wouldn’t be able to make it through the night of prodromal labor without a ball.

Early Labor: By the time Ze’en returned from REI, Cleo and I were tucked into bed together and I was hoping to get a good night sleep. However, the waves that came every 10 minute made that impossible. I ended up getting up to work through contractions by 10. By 2am I decided I needed Ze’en. I had never reached that point in the nights before, so I was starting to think that perhaps tonight would be the night.

After sitting with me for just 30 minutes, he decided it was time to call our Doula and Midwife. Firen arrived about an hour and a half later and our Doula two hours later. Firen simply sat in the room with me and allowed me to work through contractions. I would shift positions, at times going into the shower for some relief.

Cleo woke around 5. She was the perfect little helper. She would sit with me on the birth ball. Hold my hand. Dab my head and neck with a cool washcloth. She was not phased at all by the sounds and simply took it all in.

As the sun started to rise, contractions started being 1 minute and only 2 minutes apart. i started to grunt with my contractions and I made eye contact with Firen. I opted for a cervical check since I had the early urge to push with Cleo. To much of our horror after nearly 12 hours of labor, I was only 3 cm. I felt defeated. I couldn’t imagine going through 57 hours of labor again, doing the inversion, and fighting the urge to push. I worked through a few more contractions, expressing all my fear and concern. I just kept saying, “I cannot do this again”.

The power of affirmations: Our second midwife had arrived a few hours ago. While Firen went to get some rest in the other room. Morgan joined me and Ze’en. Her eye contact immediately started to help ground me. She looked at me and simply said, “You are safe. Your baby is safe. This is just how you birth.”

I felt safe. I felt strong. Like that we worked through several contractions, until I decided to close my eyes for a bit. I truly felt like I just kind of passed out. I must have only slept for 10-15 minutes. I woke up with a strong surge and a cush. My water had broken.

With the next contraction, I again was bearing down. I hopped back on the bed, and immediately Morgan saw that baby was coming now. She quickly called for Firen and my Doula and daughter. With two pushes, my baby was born.

It has been just 44 minutes since the 3cm dilation check. 12 hours of labor.

I hugged my baby to my bare chest and eventually checked to find out she was a girl!